With a name like that, is it even a sport?

The Lovely Mrs. byoolin's trebuchet asked me if I knew the internet meme that goes something like, "We [i.e., Canadians] will explain curling to you [i.e., Americans] when you explain the NRA to us."

She was taken aback that I had no idea what she was talking about. I frequently have no idea what she's talking about, but, bless her heart, the novelty does not seem to wear off.

She posited that the meme is flawed and that if it were hers to rewrite, she'd replace "the NRA" with "NASCAR." She provided a rational explanation, supporting documentation and, for all I know, may have hired McKinsey to consult on the issue.

Well, if it were mine to rewrite, I'd do it like this:

"We [i.e., Canadians] will NEVER explain curling to you [i.e., Americans]. We saw what happened with hockey: the FOX puck, obnoxious music between face-offs, advertising on the rink boards and a team in Phoenix Arifreakingzona, for crying out loud. If we explain curling, the next thing you know, there'll be cheerleaders on the edges of each sheet, Bud Lite logos on the rocks and the ESPN highlight reel will feature The Dirt Devil Sweep Of The Night."

Of course, this whole internet meme hinges on the absurd idea that there is anyone in America interested enough in curling to bother to ask someone to explain it. Can you imagine the pitch to the executives at FOX sports?

"It's got the strategy of chess and the patience of soccer, and it's on ice!"